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Comments
Bravissimo!
Excellent story, the addition of the various forces affecting Andre's life and not focusing too much (at first) on his love for Cassandra was well done.
The antagonists (for the most part) got their comeuppance and further explanation of those ramifications - while wanted, weren't necessary.
Personally, I like the 'pay-off' (A.K.A - Sex) at the end of the story after a good build up.
I like the passage:
His music was a mix of Heavy, Gothic, Thrash, Death, and Black Metal. He found it helped calm his mind, keeping it occupied and distracted from the zillions of other inputs pouring in. With the beat of Metallica's Creeping Death providing the soundtrack, he left the building and walked to school.
And him listening to The Priest's 'Painkiller' is very apropos.
11/10 British Steels!!!!!
I did find a few things that I would change...like her IV being unhooked for her to be taken for some scan (they would just take the IV with them). Also when it talks about giving her a painkiller (a pill), they would just inject it into her IV she would not be able to open her mouth to swallow it since she had a broken jaw and it was surgically wired shut.
I find this like all your other stories very good and hope you think about getting some of them published because with a bit of work on grammar and editing your stories are worth publishing